Feeling really lost. In my professional, personal, and life in general. Any tips/advice from folks who dealt with this type of disorienting experience? I will read, watch, do workbooks, seek out professional help.

Question

Noelle · Answer

Human Design: The most useful tool for self-understanding, hands down. It’s a map of your energy system and getting a reading is like being given a blueprint and user manual for yourself. It addresses everything from how you make decisions to how you best digest food. It’s a mashup of astrology, the I Ching, the Kabbalah and the chakra system (but really it’s its own thing entirely). To check your chart you need your birthdate, time, and place. If you want help figuring out what it all means, holler at me.

RKR · Answer

4000 Weeks: Basically how focusing on our finality gives the perspective needed to live a life full on

GK · Answer

Ikigai: I recently learned about Ikigai, a Japanese concept which roughly translates to finding your purpose. There are many books on the topic - may be worth exploring at a local library.

Katherine · Answer

Soul Gum podcast: Browse through the episode titles and try one that seems relevant to your situation. I find her combination of honesty, dry humor, and compassion quite effective as she delivers really helpful insight. I’ve thought during multiple episodes, “I wish I’d had this to listen to when I was feeling so lost a few years ago.”

Brigid · Answer

Circle of Control: When my life was falling apart—health, self-image, work, relationships—a social worker I worked with in a high-stress environment asked me to start doing the same exercises we asked kids in crisis to do when they were in therapy. The one that really changed things for me was the circle of control. By understanding what I could control and influence and what I could not, it made changing my circumstances (and life and much of my identity!) something far more manageable over the next few years.

Mary · Answer

Adopt a pet (if you haven’t already): Built in structure/routine and doting love of someone who needs to be loved and fed

Kate · Answer

hire a coach: I am skeptical of life coaches. I think there are grifters out there, I think there are people who are just trying to make a buck, I don't think they all help that much.

BUT. I was feeling very lost professionally earlier this year, and I decided to hire Mandy Brown, a former VP at Vox and a fantastic blogger. It was transformationally helpful. She helped me break down where I was, what I wanted to try next, and what I wanted to experiment with.

A lot of our conversations focus on what structural things I can do to achieve the life I want to achieve - less about 'how do I solve everything' and more 'how do I make the space to take small steps towards the things I want to do'. I'd been in therapy, but this was more work focused and tactical, which is what I needed.

If you have the money, recommend - she does sliding scale as well.

Kate · Answer

meditation based stress reduction (MBSR): This is an eight week course that takes meditation out of a wo-hoo religious context and into a scientific one. Lots of MDs prescribe it for chronic pain and anxiety. It had a major impact on depression.

I learned a bunch of good tools, but the best part was the people. Getting to regularly gather and learn from people at all walks of life in a vulnerable place was incredible. 10/10, recommend to anyone going through life.

I took it through my local university, just google MBSR + your city.

Mo · Answer

Try volunteer work: when I was going through a change and didn't know what to do with myself, I decided to start volunteering in my community. I think it helps if you do something completely different from what you do professionally. it helps you connect with others, you can help make change, and maybe learn more about what is important to you. in my case I volunteered with high schoolers on weekends, but previously i've done work in parks and enjoyed that too.

Nitabel · Answer

Volunteering as a way to anchor yourself in the world: In my experience, service is a powerful disruptor to the state of feeling unmoored. It shuts down the rumination loop, de-centers your own anxieties, and shifts your focus outward — and provides immediate structure, purpose, and social connection while proving that your presence and actions still matter.

There are so many resources for finding volunteer opportunities. Here are some places to start:

In your community:

Mutual Aid Hub

Food Not Bombs

A Radical Guide

National aggregator platforms:

Mobilize

Points of Light

Idealist

JustServe

Skills-based:

Catch a Fire

Taproot

Your best bet is to focus on hyperlocal activism — it addresses immediate, tangible issues in your community and operates at a scale where individual participation carries significantly more weight.

Jess · Answer

Year Compass: An exceptional reflective tool for thinking about your past year, and imagining the year to come. I've been doing it every year for a decade and I still find it extremely valuable. It's even more fun when done with friends!

Pro tip: start about a week before NYE if you want the full experience. Or skip around and just answer the questions that speak most to your heart!

Catherine Davis · Answer

The Little Frog’s Guide to Self Care: A perfect gift for anyone who is going through a hard time. It’s just sweet. Sweet pictures. Sweet suggestions. I was given this book and was touched.