How do you split finances with your partner while still keeping things romantic?

Question

Allison · Answer

A Bank Account For Home & Life Stuff: We have been married forever and merged our finances a long time ago but when we moved in together we kept our own personal bank accounts and opened a joint account for rent, utilities, food, trips, furnishings, etc. I still maintain a credit union account I call my Mad Money.

JZ · Answer

Combine accounts and set a “talk if >X” number: Two steps:

Combine accounts so you never have to discuss logistics of transferring money, who’s paying for what, etc

For discretionary purchases, decide on a number where if something costs more than X you will talk about it. And then (this is important) don’t talk about prices less than X!

Lisa · Answer

Collaboratively make a plan, then never talk about it: Hear me out: Ruminating constantly, distrust, and worry about finances is a romance killer. Get together for a big couple blocks of time to make your plan, set up all your accounts and pre-arranged deductions, schedule your periodic check ins, and agree on how much each has for play money with zero collective oversight. And then let the machine grind until your first scheduled check in. We do monthly.