I See You've Called In Dead

“You know what? F*ck John Kenney. Seriously, it's not fair that this guy gets to be so funny but also so sentimental and also pretty handsome and also married to an accomplished and beautiful wife and also they have cute adorable kids (judging from the one photo I saw on Instagram). It's not fair. But... the work is so good. Really, really funny self-deprecating humor that's generous with its double-fist, heaping, second-helpings of humanity. I wanna hate him. I can't. Dude's brilliant. Currently, I am reading his latest book I SEE YOU'VE CALLED IN DEAD: A NOVEL. It's about an obit journalist who gets drunk one night and accidentally uploads his own obit "on the website of the world’s largest wire service news organization, to be picked up by news organizations around the world." It's hilarious and so chock-full of vulnerability and heart and.... I wanna hate John Kenney for writing something so friggin thoughful, totally original and stupid clever!!! But I can't. He's an excellent writer. It doesn't help that he seems like a genuinely decent guy. When I say this book is hilarious, I mean it's f*cking funny as hell. I sit reading it at my desk while the hubs is reading The Count of Monte Cristo at his and I can't stop myself from bursting out laughing in guffaws I didn't even know I possessed. I'm just over at my desk snorting and cackling, just shitting all over my husband's escapism into 1800s France and Italy. But jeeeezussss, John Kenney is f*cking funny. I'm also reading his book of poems. No that's not a typo, you read that right – the MF has the nerve to also write poems. This slim volume of poems is called Love Poems (For Married People)... and you guessed it – it's funny and also delightful and.... oh my god how I hate this man! Where does he get off being this good and being this well... HIM!!!! All that talent plus a full head of silver fox hair is just not fair. And don't forget the sassy-looking wife and precocious looking kids. All the patriarchy at work and I can't even hate him for it. He's that good. It's not fair. But what in this life that we're living is fair? I mean, have you seen who's president?”