Halloween Costume Ideas

“no more “cat ears with black bodysuit” or “charlie brown bc i own a yellow tshirt” !! let me help you. here’s my guide. maybe share with your friend who can’t stop being slutty snow white <3”

“all you need? Bloodshot eyes. Head-to-toe A24 merch. Your carefree blonde hair at your shoulders. A relatable maternal sweater that says look at me, I’m not a scammer, I live in beachside Del Mar. Rattan furniture. Probiotic coconut yogurt. A lobotomized rich hotel tycoon husband. Prison. A lot of nodding because Youtube taught you that means you’re “listening”. One single tear. Baby bag on your arm to prove you have real children. A piercing, unrelenting gaze. A tea cup of blood with a spoonful of stolen young female ambition.”

“All you need? The skin of a smooth cherubic baby. Tight black H&M head to toe. A judgmental scowl. Hailey Bieber lip liner in your pocket. An empty mesh little shopping bag. Eyebrows as sharp as a Japanese blade. A work cellphone for inventory. Galactic hair clips. The good sense that you’re better than everyone because you are. You’re gossiping about the new hire in the perfume corner. Her primer, and her attitude, is fucked”