Not taking directions from someone who has never been there

Before you spiral out about someone's advice (or judgment), maybe take a sec to see if you actually want their life.

Someone judging your relationship, parenting, career, or life choices hits very different once you notice that most of the time you don't actually want what they have, or you're comparing apples to oranges.

As a recovering people pleaser trying to stop looking outside myself for validation and direction, this has helped me live more freely and happily, with far fewer fucks to give. It's also helped me figure out who I do want advice from, which has saved me a lot of time and confusion and made those relationships deeper.

Maybe the mom friend whose chill-ass baby slept through the night at 8 weeks isn't the person to ask for sleep advice. And your aunt with a joyful 20-year marriage might have better relationship advice than the hilarious but proudly commitment-phobic friend with the hot take.