Being a Crone

Amidst all the talk of anti-aging, let's not lose the ancient role of older women in society. Orca pods hang on to their non-reproductive members. (To be fair, they're as gorgeous as ever.) Pods with older females fare better than those without.

Why? Because institutional knowledge. Common sense. Another pair of fins that have lived through a thing or two. They know where to find fish, even in lean times.

I'm turning into a Senior Citizen this fall, and the onslaught of marketing telling me how to dress my age or fight the wrinkles make me laugh. No. Commerce has to sell, I get it. I use skincare.

But as the mother of daughters, I wouldn't dream of underselling my knowledge. What they face, I have faced. What they are dreaming of, I have, too.

It insults all women for me to fear being what I am becoming, a motherfucking CRONE. Ask me anything. Not about current fashion (though I have opinions) but about love, babies, work, bodies, institutions, workarounds, goals, creativity, anything that really matters. I know what a good life entails. Catch me while I'm still alive and thriving, and I am more than glad to share.

But if you try to shame me for being old, I will look deep into your eyes and all I will see is your fear. Your buy-in to the powers that be, who do not love you as I do. Who want to strip you of your uniqueness and autonomy. Who like you scared.

Nah. My revolution is to own my years. If you're lucky, you'll get to where I and the other cackling gray-haired ladies reside. We will welcome you.

Honestly, the water is fine.