the spider treaty

cw: spider apologetics

look, i know we’re probably anti-spider, but bear with me. the spider treaty is a way of cohabitation.

i was not stoked to see this giant house spider (literally that’s what it’s called i was like we gotta get more creative with these names) on my floor the other day. but in reality, he was just vibing, so i relocated him to not my floor.

the spider treaty is simple:

is the spider invading your space in a not-at-all chill way? this could look like being in the shower, in the sink, hanging from the kitchen ceiling at eye level, on the arm of the couch while you watch a movie. if yes, BREACH OF TREATY, deletion is acceptable (relocation also and always acceptable)

is the spider just vibing up in the corner? hiding in a crevice? otherwise minding its own business and gobbling up the occasional moth and/or gnat? if yes, adherence to the treaty, no deletion necessary, relocation acceptable if desired.